Issue Two
As Thanksgiving approaches, a lot of people notice their stress showing up a little faster than usual.
Routines shift. Expectations get louder. Time with family or familiar people increases — sometimes before we even realize how much it affects us.
If you feel more reactive, more tired, or more on edge around Thanksgiving, it doesn’t mean you’re regressing.
It means your nervous system is responding to history, proximity, and pressure.
This Issue’s Focus
Why Safety Comes Before Change
Many people go into Thanksgiving telling themselves to “handle it better this year.”
Be calmer.
Be more patient.
Don’t take things personally.
But your nervous system doesn’t respond to intentions — it responds to cues of safety and threat.
Familiar roles, old dynamics, and unspoken expectations can activate responses that were learned long ago, often before you had much choice.
You’re not overreacting.
You’re responding.
And real change doesn’t start with forcing different behavior.
It starts with creating enough safety to stay present.
A Grounding Technique
The Internal Boundary Check
This is a simple check-in you can use before, during, or after Thanksgiving gatherings.
Pause and ask yourself:
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This question shifts the focus away from what you should do and toward what your nervous system actually needs.
When stress is high, we often default to pushing through or people-pleasing. Pausing to identify whether your body needs space, calming input, or emotional reassurance helps interrupt automatic responses and supports regulation before reaction.
Meeting the body’s need first makes everything else easier.
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Many people hold themselves to standards they would never apply to others — especially during family gatherings or emotionally loaded situations.
This question highlights internal double standards and helps bring awareness to self-abandonment patterns, guilt-driven endurance, or over-responsibility.
Noticing this doesn’t mean you have to change anything immediately. Awareness alone creates space for healthier boundaries.
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Perfection and survival often get confused during stressful seasons.
This question reframes success as sufficiency, not performance. It encourages realistic expectations that align with your energy, capacity, and emotional state — especially when circumstances are demanding.
“Enough” is often more sustainable, compassionate, and effective than aiming for flawless behavior.
This isn’t about confrontation or fixing anything in the moment.
It’s about noticing your limits and responding to them with care.
Boundaries don’t always start with words.
Often, they start internally.
Practice Notes
Behind the scenes, I’m continuing to think about new ways to increase engagement and foster a stronger sense of community within Embark.
One idea I’m currently considering is starting a therapy-centered podcast — a space to talk openly about topics people commonly struggle with, offer insight, and share tools that can help make those challenges feel more manageable.
Nothing political. Nothing sensational.
Just thoughtful conversations centered on understanding and support.
Community Reflection
If you’d like to reflect — privately or on the Community Wall — here’s a gentle prompt:
As Thanksgiving approaches, many people notice mixed emotions — gratitude, stress, sadness, nostalgia, or all of the above.
What are you hoping to protect or honor for yourself this Thanksgiving?
There’s no right way to engage.
Quiet awareness counts just as much as sharing.